(originally posted on December 7, 2013)
This is the mantra I live by.
Jesus' teaching.
But apparently just because I want to do it,
it doesn't mean that it will be reciprocated.
Today during recess, one of the parents made some lengthy remark about me to another parent that was loud enough for me to hear.
The issue at hand was a favor that she asked me to help her kid with.
Rather than thanking me for doing her/them a favor, she complained.
Actually I won't take it personally if she didn't like what I had to offer.
But I expected more of her.
At least have the decency and respect for me to come talk to me if she had issues.
I didn't say she had to follow what I said.
I gave her a suggestion and said "how about this..."?
Certainly I wasn't cutting off communication.
This is not the first time she blew up, just a different expression of it.
She has ups and downs.
When things are good, they don't last.
Something will bound to happen.
So I guess I should say I wasn't so surprised.
It's so unfortunate though.
Because I don't want to stereotype people.
But if there is repeated pattern of behavior, what is one to expect?
The question then becomes what should I do?
Because it was something I did for her/them, and not for the class,
I felt assured at least it's not about my teaching.
I need to lay down some ground rules about how we are to treat each other in class.
This pertains not only to the kids, but also to their parents.
I don't like to do this.
Yet I need to be strong about it.
Because for people who uses emotion to control others, people who manipulates with outbursts of anger,
the best way is to avoid them.
It is not dodging the issue.
It is knowing what is the ultimate goal.
Will she change because I speak to her and ask her not to do what she did?
Very unlikely.
So the point is to set up some parameters for all of us to know, so that all of us can work with.
Setting up boundaries is the best thing I can do.
And much prayers! Gulp.
Jesus' teaching.
But apparently just because I want to do it,
it doesn't mean that it will be reciprocated.
Today during recess, one of the parents made some lengthy remark about me to another parent that was loud enough for me to hear.
The issue at hand was a favor that she asked me to help her kid with.
Rather than thanking me for doing her/them a favor, she complained.
Actually I won't take it personally if she didn't like what I had to offer.
But I expected more of her.
At least have the decency and respect for me to come talk to me if she had issues.
I didn't say she had to follow what I said.
I gave her a suggestion and said "how about this..."?
Certainly I wasn't cutting off communication.
This is not the first time she blew up, just a different expression of it.
She has ups and downs.
When things are good, they don't last.
Something will bound to happen.
So I guess I should say I wasn't so surprised.
It's so unfortunate though.
Because I don't want to stereotype people.
But if there is repeated pattern of behavior, what is one to expect?
The question then becomes what should I do?
Because it was something I did for her/them, and not for the class,
I felt assured at least it's not about my teaching.
I need to lay down some ground rules about how we are to treat each other in class.
This pertains not only to the kids, but also to their parents.
I don't like to do this.
Yet I need to be strong about it.
Because for people who uses emotion to control others, people who manipulates with outbursts of anger,
the best way is to avoid them.
It is not dodging the issue.
It is knowing what is the ultimate goal.
Will she change because I speak to her and ask her not to do what she did?
Very unlikely.
So the point is to set up some parameters for all of us to know, so that all of us can work with.
Setting up boundaries is the best thing I can do.
And much prayers! Gulp.
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